when a person leavin in outskirts of the city trying hard to speak english

i bought this mastika book(june edition) for rm4.20 during my visit in kijal..the book was fully-loaded with mysteries, strange cultures, weird asses n the rest r crap.but it;s not bad lar for a rm 4 book rite?...fully-printed with color somemore..ok...i m gonna reveal a joke inside this book to share with u;ll(this is one of the crap in the book yet i m talkin bout it)..hope u guys out there noe a lil knowledge bout bm.

tijah budak kg tapi bekerja di kl.pakaian seksi maut, bercinta dengan lelaki mat salleh.ke hulu ke hilir menayangkan boyfrennya .punyalah eksyen tijah hingga suatu hari dia ternampak lelaki inggeris tadi dengan wanita lain yang lebih cantik darinya.tijah menangis selama tiga hari..pada hari keempat dia mengambil sehelai kertas dan menulis surat untuk memutuskan perhubungannya dengan lelaki itu. beginilah surat yang ditulis tijah

john...
i want to cut connection us. i have think about this very cook cook. i know i clap one hand onli. correctly, i have seen you n she walk walk together at town with eyes myself. you grab hand she. you always ask for apology back-back.i dun trust u again.u r really a crocodile land(tanah buaya...i dun realli get this)
my fren speak u play wood three. first first i think my fren lie me
but now i noe u correct correct play wood three. so i break connection to pull my body from this love triangle. i know this result i pick is very correct b'cos you love she very high from me. so i cut this connection to go far from here. i dun wan u play play with my liver.i have been crying until no more eye water. i dun wan banana fruit two time
safe walk
tijah...

so wat u think the ang mo kio would think leh???

fruitless trip

sori for the lack of updates. examinations had lasted for almost 3 weeks n i jus got back from my trip to kijal.it was a good trip although there weren't much naked eurasian women hanging out in the beach. instead, played basketball with lil' kids n aunties. din even shoot any ball. jus play monkey with them oni.lol.freakin evil.then i did some gyming...my arms felt sore the next day.went for fishing with my dad n bro...bro got his first fish with the length bout 3 inches...not badlar..dammit...i empty hand again..haha...the fussion at the buffer was just fine while dinner at typical chinese restaurants took hours but worth my patience...so this is how the pool look like:...o yeah... forgotten to mention something....while my father was jogging near the golf course ...he saw two creatures which he described it as something like this:
but wait a minute...it reminded me exactly about wei ping n his lil black n white dog

crappucino

today....came home bout probably round 10 after my physics exam.actualli i kinda ponteng come out.. to put in a better way, i followed my fren's mum;s car.imagine dat another 3 of my fren was in a tiny kancil as well..so there r bout 6 ppl in the congested car.. then my fren terpaksa go sit oon my lap..damn pain my balls when the kancil jumped over bumps..lol...my fren's mum felt kinda guilty cos she just rushed through the guard's gate...wasai...she said her car is now forbidden to enter the skool compound n she felt guilty...lol..anhyway back home now....bloggin n checkin out nba scores...can u beilieve it? cavs leads pistons 3-2..alrite..gtg now

cat abused!!

wth,,,,,,,,i must be feelind kinda stressed out. frens n foes just asked me to chill out but i guess i must have the jekyll hyde personality..today the devil realli emerged from my sound mind. actually since a couple of weeks ago there had been a few grey n black kittens wandering around my house...i din realli give a them lar...but today..when i opened my side door, i saw the grey mother cat with her three kittens..instinctively the mother cat rushed in front of them ,glared at me with a hissing sound trying to halau me away....fearin it will rampaged its way into my house, i quickly shut the door
later...somehow i had evolved into mr hyde..i went to fill a cup of water filled with soap solution...next i noticed the mother cat was still at the doorsteps...swinging the door open,i throw the cup of water to the direction of the innocent mamalia.o rite at the intended target with a 'deadly' effect.. the cat was realli startled n ran for her life.oddly i smiled to myself when she made somekind of sound similar to a human voice when they r suddenly frightened by their fren....dammit.exams made me go like a psychopath...haha....i hope i wun be abusing normal human beings next time

spinning wheel

sori for the lack of updates....busy with examinations.....everyday i came back from skool.......i felt realli exhausted..i dunno how i will last for spm.must be gettin old dee...senior veteran liao..today's i was supposed to study bio.but end up doin nothin...i din even bother to go to the temple...told my mum wanted to study..but instead go browse through the STAR..wth.then later go play euro 2004 (wth this is 2006 dee)...anyway, later i went for a mother's day diner with relatives n family at port klang...
damn the food was sumptuos...the guls there were hot as well...hoho...serampang dua mata,,,,,the steamed crab with honey gravy was god-like...my mouth is drooling dee...haha..oklar.i hope i got somesort of inspiration for tmrw to study this gibbrish subject

123456

i dun realli know how to explain it vividly but today is 04/o5/o6. Plus, it is bout approx 20 more minutes to 1.02 am. So, precisely at 1.02 am and 3 miliseconds, it would be 010203040506. According to the local newspaper, this pattern of number only repeats once in a hundred years. haha.........so enjoy this moment although almost everybody is already dozing off in their slumber bed. yeah, there's even one dude from penang offered to tatto customers with the number 123456 in his shop in penang to mark this date,,,,,,,,,,wth,,-_-.
anyway exam is comin soon....damn stressful weh..the teacher said i looked relax...wth..well, i guess i must have been a playful n happy go lucky dude in the class. Less than 5 days now b4 the first exam, i must manage my time properly or else i would be skinned by mum....

u think i m a loan shark isit?

Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
halo
tENg JiaN says:
hellor
Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
can u help me 1 thing>
tENg JiaN says:
yeah
tENg JiaN says:
sure..wat;s dat?
Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
u use 012/016
tENg JiaN says:
o
tENg JiaN says:
i got no hplar
tENg JiaN says:
haha
tENg JiaN says:
wat;s the prob?
Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
...
Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
jz wan u transfer credit money to me onlu
Hi AlL My FrIeNd...LoNg TiMe No SeE...hEhE... says:
only
tENg JiaN says:
wat the hell........
(she stopped typin after dat XD)
wat the sohai man!!!!...we had nvr been active chatters n she suddenli asked me for credit for her hp.....she thinks i m lim gotong's son meh.......or if u r as pretty as tata young den may b i will think of a waylar..but we dun even noe each other.so wat the heck is ur prob?